Hi guys, its been a while since I wrote fanfiction, and here I am back with a new fic, and its BTS, cause I love them so much now.I feel kind of bad because I haven't finished my previous PinkFinite fic yet, but well.. its because I lose all of my drafts, and I already given up. I already wrote till the end, and my laptop broke, so I lose it all. It sucks, but well I gotta move on.
And here I am with a new fics. Hope you enjoy!
English is not my mother language, so I'm really sucks at it, well I used it for professional conversation and emails but writing a fic in English is a whole new world for me. So please bare with my sometimes weird sentences, grammatical error, etc, I'm just trying to challenge myself.
All characters are not mine, it belongs to themselves and their company.
Y/N is Your Name, you can put and imagine you are belongs to this story and become the main character. However since I will put Author point of view, so I need to put Y/N name. I can't imagine any name except PARK AH MI. Yes, AH MI, If you know what I mean by choosing this name, I love you!. LOL
And about Y/N photo, I just need a girl photo as reference so I choose Son Naeun, you can imagine other girl tho, its up to you.
At last lets get into the story, I hope you will not get bored reading through this story.
TRIGGER WARNING!
This story contains angst, a deep dark one (abandonment, severe self blame)
So please don't read it if you are not comfortable.
Please stay safe and healthy.
Y/N (Reader/ Park Ahmi)
Jeon Jungkook
Min Yoongi
Our path once crossed..
But then its tangled..
We couldn’t escape..
So we burnt each other..
Jungkook POV
"Noona, I love you, I’m sorry"
These words which I always kept secret all this years finally slip out of my mouth.
I’m scared, what she will think of me after I said those words.
I saw her eye widened, but then its soften.
And she said, "I love you too Jungkook ah"
She’s smiling, and I really love that smile.
But somehow I feel bitter.
"Noona, I love you in a forbidden way"
She look at me, his eyes looks so confused.
We've lived together as brother and sister, even if we are not related for so long..
but then.. I betray her. I love her, as a woman.
"I’m sorry Noona, I love you, as a woman,
and its getting hard for me to stay here with you, suppressing all my feelings"
I bit my lip, its hurt, but there’s no other way than this.
Otherwise, I will be even more broken.
"I can not stay with you anymore, I said, avoiding her eyes.
Then, I left her.
This is the best for both of us.
I can’t lie anymore, I just can’t.
After all those things I’ve done.
After taking the life of her precious one.
I can’t be by your side anymore,
not the sinful me.
Y/N POV
Hearing those three words from him sounds really strange..
We have lived together for three years but I always be the one saying those words.
I love him of course, I want to take care of him as my little brother.
But.. he love me as woman?
Did I hear wrong?
And he says he’s hurt
He can’t live with me anymore, he’s gonna leave me alone.
Just like Dad..
Just like Mom..
Just like Yoongi..
Yoongi..
My mind wandered on that night..
because of my selfishness, he died, in my hands.
I feel the hole in my hearts starts bleeding
It hurts.
By the time I came to my sense, Jungkook already left.
He won’t comeback
I will be all alone again.
Jungkook POV
I killed him.
With my words, with my actions.
I love him, but it turns out that I love Noona more.
Due to my selfishness I ruined everything.
Yoongi hyung, I’m sorry.
Noona, I’m sorry.
I shouldn’t have tell the truth to you, I should have denied, I should have lied
If I knew back then it could save you, it could save us.
But then, I was selfish, I am still. I only protect myself from getting hurt, in the process I messed up.
Do I deserve to live?
No, but dying is a luxury for me, with this sin, I should live a miserable life.
I don’t deserve happiness.
Y/N POV
Yoongi.
Mint haired boy who stole my heart.
He stole it and take it away and never give it back, now my chest is empty and bleeding.
“Do you know how to play piano?”
He said while smirking, tilting his head to the side, his mint hair cover one of his eyes.
He’s so breathtakingly beautiful, his pale skin, veiny hands and those eyes, deep and full of secrets.
“Just a little, I only can play this”
I said while pointing at my music sheet, Claire De Lune by Debussy, my favorite piece.
He walked closer, sitting beside me, he starts moving his fingers on the piano.
His eyes closed, I started to hear beautiful sound, Claire de lune sounds so different.
It's sadder, desperate.
I wonder how he is able to play the piece so beautifully.
“Don’t you think you stare too much? I could have holes in my head” He said while smiling teasing me.
My face was getting warm, bet its as red as tomato now.
I mean, the way he play piano was so.. mysteriously and sadly beautiful if that makes sense, and I can’t help mysef not to stare. Moreover, I feel that deep down he has same scars as me, I feel it, I wonder why.
“Do you ever abandoned by someone?”
Damn, My mouth has its own soul and now betraying me completely.
He looks at me, no expression painted in his face, and no words coming out of his mouth.
I feel kind of scared, he’s looking at my eyes so intensely it burns, I had to look away.
With a heavy breath he asked, "Why you think like that?”
He looks away from my eyes to the brown piano he was playing earlier.
“I know how it feels and I know what abandonment can affect a person, I feel it.. cause it happened to me too”
I said, looking at his eyes. Now that pair of eyes shows their secrets, pain, trauma, abandonment, regrets and it hurts me cause I can read it like an open book.
He looks away, breaking our eye contacts. Brushing his mint hair to the side, he got up.
“Lets go back, Jungkook is looking for us” he said while walking out of the room.
“Yoongi ya” damn again, I internally curse and slap my mouth, why I call his name, moreover its our first encounter.
He stops in his track, I can see from the side, he’s smiling, no, perhaps smirking?
“Don’t you think you are too young to call me that?” He asked while tilting his head, now facing me.
“Uhm no? I think we’re of same age” I replied nonchalantly.
He looks surprised, he raised one of his eyebrow, amused at my reply.
Then, I don’t expect he’ll walk closer to me who still stand near the brown piano we’re both played earlier.
He looks at me, keeps walking closer, closing the gap between us.
I feel my heart beating in an abnormal way, I think I’m sick, gosh.
He leaned in closer to my side, his intoxicating scent clouded my brain, he smells woody and musky if that makes sense?
“Euphoria, Wednesday 4 PM”
His breath caress my neck when he whisper those sentence to my ears, sending chills down my spine.
I swear my brain stop functioning for a moment.
And then he fckin smirk, what the hell this Yoongi did to me.
“Let’s go, your cute lil brother Jungkook will kill me if we’re not back now”
He said while leaving me out of the room, still dumbfounded.
....
That day, my heart is stolen, the mint haired Yoongi did that.
I have no regrets for falling for him.
What I regrets is, not letting him hear what I really feel before he left me.... forever.
.....
To Be Continued..
....
So that's it Part 1, what do you think?
I feels so awkward writing in English, moreover its been a while since I wrote a fic! OMG, all these months I was so busy working and I think my English Literature skill has been so deteriorating. LOL I'm more used to write formal sentence and use business wording now. But well I hope you enjoy!
I will keep posting next Part, once I have time. LOL
By the way, I still couldn't decide the title, so I just put "Burn" as the title now. LOL, please comment if you have any suggestions!
Thank you so much and byeh! see you on next part!
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