It's Saturday finally!
After long days of working, I'm really glad I can stay home all day this Saturday, and to add that the weather is so bad today, it's perfect for lazing around while updating this fic.
So here it is part 6, I hope I don't disappoint. LOL anyways, there's no one reading so It's not concern me that bad.
And big thanks to my friend @sg_bee31 at twitter who made me really good Trailer video.
Hohohoo its really good. I will post the video here, but well somehow it failed.
I will check what's wrong with this blog. I really want to put the video hereeee.
It's hereee
Anyways without further ado, here it is Part 6.
TRIGGER WARNING!
This story contains angst, a deep dark one (abandonment, severe self blame and hatred). So please don't read it if you are not comfortable.Please stay safe and healthy.
You can read previous part here:
[BTS Fanfiction] Burn Part 1
[BTS Fanfiction] Burn Part 2
[BTS Fanfiction] Burn Part 3
[BTS Fanfiction] Burn Part 4
[BTS Fanfiction] Burn Part 5
Burn - Part 6
Jungkook POV
"You will not experience the pain of losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place"
I still remember back when I was still in that place, someone ever said those words to me.
And since that time, I crafted that words clearly in my heart and mind.
I decided not to keep someone in my heart.
Because?
I don't want to feel the pain of losing.
Honestly I have no idea of what that pain feels like, because I was alone ever since.
But all the kids in that orphanage always told their stories, how the pain kills them when their loved ones, mother and father left them alone in that orphanage.
Yeah.
"Love Yourself" Orphanage is where I grow up.
I didn't remember since when I was there.
Perhaps since I was born?
I can not remember
But I kind of relieved that I can not remember a thing, again... I was lucky.. because I don't have to experience being abandoned by your parents.
I don't have to feel the pain like the other kids in that orphanage.
Listening to their stories, I realize the pain is unbearable. and that one sentence "You will not experience the pain losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place" really engraved deep in my heart.
I don't want to feel the pain, I don't want to be weak because of that pain, so I will just not let anyone get in to my heart.
It's better not to have anyone.
On that sunny day, someone came up to me, It was a man in his thirties.
He was being brought by the orphanage Mom, I usually called her like that. She introduced him to me.
And soon after, that man adopt me. I was confused, why he want to adopt me, but again I felt nothing,
I made my heart felt nothing. I don't want to feel it.
When I was brought to that man's house, it seems like he's all alone.
And day by day passed, without us talking to each other. then I kept wondering why did he adopt me back then.
I can't understand.
There's no point of us playing son and child, when there isn't even any interaction between us.
I didn't try to reach out to him. I kept thinking he's the one who should reach out to me.
Thus, when he died at that night.
I felt nothing.
because in the first place I didn't consider him as "something"
Is it wrong?
or perhaps I'm too cruel? Perhaps I'm the one in the wrong?
I can't figure out.
I live my life everyday worthlessly, yes, my life was so empty, and I can't help feeling so lonely. Every night I was just walking around, aimlessly, hoping I could find something fun to experience.
But mostly it was none.
Until that day.
I was walking in front of an old Music Shop, the banner said "Euphoria". I giggled a little reading the name. So tacky, i thought. Why did the owner name it like that?
It really doesn't suit the shop because the shop is kind of like a broken down shop, to add that the instrument they sell is really old style.
Why can't they name it a more classier and old style rather than "Euphoria".
I kept walking pass that shop, until a mint haired boy shows up. He walks closer to my direction, in the other side of the road, across mine.
Then he stopped in front of that glass display of the Music Shop, staring at that brown piano in that Shop.
I was curious what's in his mind, I even thought that he plan to steal something, but I realized that that Shop literally has nothing worth to steal.
I was going to continue walking when I saw a car, well most accurately a mini pick up truck stopped abruptly in front of that Music Shop.
Then I saw an orange haired guys shouted,
"Yoongi hyung, lets go! the police is here!"
What? Police?
What are these guys?
Are they criminals?
I saw the mint haired guy was sighing a bit then running towards the truck, he hop in to the open back of that truck.
I was bewildered by what I saw, and even considering to call 911, but I was just standing there stared at them.
I don't know how many of those 'seems like dangerous guys' are. But I can see the mint haired one whom I guess named Yoongi? the orange haired one, and the other two were also sitting on that open back of the truck, and of course the one driving and the one sitting on the passengers seat,
Okay so they're six, it's a lot.
I usually not the kind of guy who really like to get into dangerous situation, but this time perhaps my everyday life was so dead boring so I kind of have the feeling of wanting to join that group of guys. And I don't realize all this time I was staring at them.
I snapped back to reality when the mint haired boy was looking at me and shouting,
"Hey coconut boy! Come hop in!"
I was dumbfounded, who was he calling coconut boy?
Does he mean, Me?
Like seriously, I am not coconut.
But well I don't have time to argue because on the opposite of that truck direction, two policemen were running while swearing and shouting at them.
Or maybe, at me, because I guess they thought I was one of them.
Damn.
Screw my life.
I just can't let myself being caught by police. That's my absolute nightmare.
And after that brain processing and reasoning.. I'm running to that truck and hop in at the back of it.
That mint haired guy pull my hands in and help me.
Then, the truck started dashing, and drift away in full speed.
I was laughing and its been awhile since I laugh like that..
It's the first time in my life I experience such a thrilling moment. And I was so happy.
Its weird because I didn't even know these guys, perhaps they are bad guys or some robber or some sort.
Or perhaps I have gotten myself into some mafia game or something like that.
But for sure, it feels a lot better than being lonely and empty in that 'man who claimed as my father's house.
I was still smiling when that orange haired guy whines,
"Damn...we're in troubles, what are doing Taehyung ah?" he said while sighing and look at the guy who has bowl cut.
and that bow cut guy only laughing. Well.... I don't know what are they up to, but it seems so interesting.
"Calm down Jimin ah, Namjoon hyung and I only gave that bastard a lesson, I'm just sick of them. I can't stand a bully that has all that money and power and think that they can do whatever they want. So guess what.. I just screw their cars. " that bowl cut guy answered really enthusiastically.
Damn these guys are really problematic.
But somehow, I can not say they're a hundred percent in the wrong, well at least they had reasons.
The orange haired guy, whom I guess his name is Jimin, and the bowl cut guy, guess the name is Taehyung are bickering.
But mostly the Jimin guy was whining, and the Taehyung guy only laughing non stop. They are a funny duo. Unknowingly I smiled at them.
"So... who are you ? what's your name?" I heard another guy, another bowl cut guy with kind of long face asked me.
He looked at me while smiling, well he smiled so cheerfully, I was quite taken a back.
"Uh... I'm.. Jungkook" I replied, well giving out my name will not get me into some sort of troubles right? I was assuring myself.
The bickering duos stop their silly convo once they heard me talking, seems like they just realized I was there. They look at me with such curiosity.
"So Jungkook ah, welcome to Bangtan!"
Out of no where, the mint haired guy shouted and clapping his hands, the other guys also clapping and suddenly the Jimin guy was hugging my back.
I just thought, what are these guys?
What is Bangtan?
But well.. at that time I don't care even if they might be criminals, gangster, mafia or some sort..
Because.. it's my first time to be really welcomed. and part of something..
My existence finally has meaning, I guess.
And since then.. Bangtan was my home.. The six guys were my brothers..
And I started to feel care.. I finally begin to have feelings, some sort of affection and attachment.
I have something I cared about.
They made me begin..
But then.. as the words that engraved in my heart says ""You will not experience how it feels when losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place" erase that "not" part into positive sentence, I begin to feel really scared.
What if I lose them?
How painful will I feel?
I'm scared.
Especially for Yoongi hyung.
Because I thought I could lose him that day.
It was a usual day.. but that day, most of the Hyungs has something else to do so we can not hang out full team.
It was only me and Yoongi hyung. We just walk around and unknowingly we stopped at Euphoria Music Shop. I'm still giggling when I read that name, its still too tacky to my liking.
Yoongi Hyung was staring at that piano again. I saw sadness in his eyes. I don't know what it is, he never told us about it.
When the old man whom I guess is the owner of that shop offer him to play that piano, Yoongi hyung just shake his hands politely, but somehow I know he would like to play it.
So I just pull his hands and drag him into the shop, I want him to play that piano. I know he really wanted to play it.
"Hyung, lets play it!" I drag Yoongi hyung into the shop and sit in front of that piano.
Yoongi hyung was really hesitant, he was already sitting in front of that piano. His fingers are ready on top of the notes, but he didn't play it. He couldn't.
Because at that time, I saw his hands trembled, I don't know what happened to him, but his eyes looks really hurt, badly hurt.
He keeps trembling and I don't know what to do.
"Hyung! are you okay? hyung?" I shake his shoulder, to me.. he seems like falling into a deep abyss.. his eyes looks so dead.
His hands feels cold, and he keeps trembled..
I really don't know what to do..
then some part of my brain which still functioning tell me to quickly brings Yoongi hyung to hospital.
So again, I dragged him out of that music shop,
I was panicking..
should I call taxi?
or should we run? but I'm not sure if Yoongi hyung can run while he trembles badly.
My mind was a mess, and we keep walking, because I can't seem to find taxi in that area.
I keep gazing at Yoongi hyung.
Strangely, he seems getting better, and stop trembling, after a moment.
I relieved a bit. But still I think we have to go to hospital, I'm really afraid something bad might happened.
"Hyung, are you okay? we should go to hospital" I said while observing his expression and it seems he's getting better, his eyes started to have life in them.
"I'm okay.. " He said shortly, and he expect me to believe that?
"No Hyung, we should go to hospital" I said sternly, and ready to drag him again, this time to a freaking hospital, because he need it.
But he push my hands away,
"No, I just need my pills." He said, while walking away.
I was taken aback.
I didn't know Yoongi hyung was sick to the point that he has to take pills?
I was so worried that I follow him to his apartment. Of course, he keeps shooing me away and walking or even running away.
Sigh... this hyung why he's like that, I can't understand either.
But then, he don't have any choice to let me in once I reached his apartment.
While sighting dramatically he let me in.
And that day. he finally open up to me.
He's been sick, and constantly need his pills to calm his panic attack, and go to psychiatric..
All because of that horrible incident.
He told me everything.
About the fire..
his mother..
everything..
at least that's what I thought.
But it seems, it was not all.
And I was so oblivious.
only if I knew.. i wouldn't have done something horrible as that night.
I hurt Yoongi hyung so bad.
I was the one who drive him to his.... death...
Y/N POV
I never thought waking up late with a sore body was really a happiness for me.
It was because.. when I woke up, he was right beside me..
when I woke up all I can see is his face.. his mint hair.. his cute sleeping face.. his hands which currently still holding mine really tight..
and that words that he muttered yesterday..I still remember it clearly
"I love you"
Those three words succeeded in making me blushed.
"Y/N..... " I heard his raspy voice...
I just smiled, when he opened his eyes, while looking at me. He's too adorable.
But suddenly I'm really worried.
Did he remember what he said last night?
Did he remember saying he loved me?
or was it just sleep talking?
what if he forget and my heart fluttered for nothing?
Somehow I feel slight tug in my heart and hit some realization. I shouldn't be all fluttered my self, I should get a hold of myself, or otherwise I will be brokenhearted.
And thus, I let his hand go.
"I should get going..... " I said while getting up and I also saw Yoongi getting up as well.
After collecting all my things, bags and stuff, I look at him. I really hope he say something which can assure me.
What are we now. But he said nothing, so I just keep going to the door.
"Bye" I said, I cannot control my feelings, honestly I feel disappointed. It seems like he forgot. Or perhaps, its only in my dreams in the first place. How stupid I am.
I sigh..
Now this is what broken heart feels like.
Its painful.
I opened the door of Yoongis apartment, I swear I will never come back again, and I hope my brain and my body won't do anything that betray that promise.
Before I shut the door to his apartment, I heard he called my name.
"Y/N... I will pick you up today" He said calmly.
I was taken aback.
Pick me up? what did he mean.
It was probably shook me so bad that I turn my head as fast as lightning, thank God my neck didn't break or something.
"Pick me what?" I asked him.
And he just smiled. Yoongi just smiled with half asleep face while scratching that mint hair of his.
"Pick you up from work... then.. we will have our first date.. " He said, simply.
And I can't comprehend, because I didn't expect it at all.
"First da... wha..t?" I stuttered.
"I think you will late for work.. " He said while signaling to look at my watch.
And he's right, I'll be late. My boss will kill me if I'm late, and it means I can't have date with him.
No I don't want that to happen.
So I just hurriedly go to the office, but then my mind wanders a lot to him, and I get nervous, because... today is our first date.
Dating Min Yoongi.
Was a happiness.
I really felt happiness when I am with him.
But then.. love is not all about happiness, and fluttery moments.
It has darkness as well, I am well aware of that.
But I believe if I'm with him, we can get through it together, that was I thought.
However, as expected, it was very hard.
Watching him struggling was a very painful experience for me. But, I already promised, i will support him.. so even if he's in pain, I have to support him to keep going, to keep fighting.
I thought that we are fighting together..
But it seems he was in fact fighting alone..
Because my words of support can't reach him..
How can it reach him?
It's not the kind of words he would like to hear..
All this time, I said wrong words.. the words which even poison him even more..
......
To Be Continued
......
"You will not experience the pain of losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place"
I still remember back when I was still in that place, someone ever said those words to me.
And since that time, I crafted that words clearly in my heart and mind.
I decided not to keep someone in my heart.
Because?
I don't want to feel the pain of losing.
Honestly I have no idea of what that pain feels like, because I was alone ever since.
But all the kids in that orphanage always told their stories, how the pain kills them when their loved ones, mother and father left them alone in that orphanage.
Yeah.
"Love Yourself" Orphanage is where I grow up.
I didn't remember since when I was there.
Perhaps since I was born?
I can not remember
But I kind of relieved that I can not remember a thing, again... I was lucky.. because I don't have to experience being abandoned by your parents.
I don't have to feel the pain like the other kids in that orphanage.
Listening to their stories, I realize the pain is unbearable. and that one sentence "You will not experience the pain losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place" really engraved deep in my heart.
I don't want to feel the pain, I don't want to be weak because of that pain, so I will just not let anyone get in to my heart.
It's better not to have anyone.
On that sunny day, someone came up to me, It was a man in his thirties.
He was being brought by the orphanage Mom, I usually called her like that. She introduced him to me.
And soon after, that man adopt me. I was confused, why he want to adopt me, but again I felt nothing,
I made my heart felt nothing. I don't want to feel it.
When I was brought to that man's house, it seems like he's all alone.
And day by day passed, without us talking to each other. then I kept wondering why did he adopt me back then.
I can't understand.
There's no point of us playing son and child, when there isn't even any interaction between us.
I didn't try to reach out to him. I kept thinking he's the one who should reach out to me.
Thus, when he died at that night.
I felt nothing.
because in the first place I didn't consider him as "something"
Is it wrong?
or perhaps I'm too cruel? Perhaps I'm the one in the wrong?
I can't figure out.
I live my life everyday worthlessly, yes, my life was so empty, and I can't help feeling so lonely. Every night I was just walking around, aimlessly, hoping I could find something fun to experience.
But mostly it was none.
Until that day.
I was walking in front of an old Music Shop, the banner said "Euphoria". I giggled a little reading the name. So tacky, i thought. Why did the owner name it like that?
It really doesn't suit the shop because the shop is kind of like a broken down shop, to add that the instrument they sell is really old style.
Why can't they name it a more classier and old style rather than "Euphoria".
I kept walking pass that shop, until a mint haired boy shows up. He walks closer to my direction, in the other side of the road, across mine.
Then he stopped in front of that glass display of the Music Shop, staring at that brown piano in that Shop.
I was curious what's in his mind, I even thought that he plan to steal something, but I realized that that Shop literally has nothing worth to steal.
I was going to continue walking when I saw a car, well most accurately a mini pick up truck stopped abruptly in front of that Music Shop.
Then I saw an orange haired guys shouted,
"Yoongi hyung, lets go! the police is here!"
What? Police?
What are these guys?
Are they criminals?
I saw the mint haired guy was sighing a bit then running towards the truck, he hop in to the open back of that truck.
I was bewildered by what I saw, and even considering to call 911, but I was just standing there stared at them.
I don't know how many of those 'seems like dangerous guys' are. But I can see the mint haired one whom I guess named Yoongi? the orange haired one, and the other two were also sitting on that open back of the truck, and of course the one driving and the one sitting on the passengers seat,
Okay so they're six, it's a lot.
I usually not the kind of guy who really like to get into dangerous situation, but this time perhaps my everyday life was so dead boring so I kind of have the feeling of wanting to join that group of guys. And I don't realize all this time I was staring at them.
I snapped back to reality when the mint haired boy was looking at me and shouting,
"Hey coconut boy! Come hop in!"
I was dumbfounded, who was he calling coconut boy?
Does he mean, Me?
Like seriously, I am not coconut.
But well I don't have time to argue because on the opposite of that truck direction, two policemen were running while swearing and shouting at them.
Or maybe, at me, because I guess they thought I was one of them.
Damn.
Screw my life.
I just can't let myself being caught by police. That's my absolute nightmare.
And after that brain processing and reasoning.. I'm running to that truck and hop in at the back of it.
That mint haired guy pull my hands in and help me.
Then, the truck started dashing, and drift away in full speed.
I was laughing and its been awhile since I laugh like that..
It's the first time in my life I experience such a thrilling moment. And I was so happy.
Its weird because I didn't even know these guys, perhaps they are bad guys or some robber or some sort.
Or perhaps I have gotten myself into some mafia game or something like that.
But for sure, it feels a lot better than being lonely and empty in that 'man who claimed as my father's house.
I was still smiling when that orange haired guy whines,
"Damn...we're in troubles, what are doing Taehyung ah?" he said while sighing and look at the guy who has bowl cut.
and that bow cut guy only laughing. Well.... I don't know what are they up to, but it seems so interesting.
"Calm down Jimin ah, Namjoon hyung and I only gave that bastard a lesson, I'm just sick of them. I can't stand a bully that has all that money and power and think that they can do whatever they want. So guess what.. I just screw their cars. " that bowl cut guy answered really enthusiastically.
Damn these guys are really problematic.
But somehow, I can not say they're a hundred percent in the wrong, well at least they had reasons.
The orange haired guy, whom I guess his name is Jimin, and the bowl cut guy, guess the name is Taehyung are bickering.
But mostly the Jimin guy was whining, and the Taehyung guy only laughing non stop. They are a funny duo. Unknowingly I smiled at them.
"So... who are you ? what's your name?" I heard another guy, another bowl cut guy with kind of long face asked me.
He looked at me while smiling, well he smiled so cheerfully, I was quite taken a back.
"Uh... I'm.. Jungkook" I replied, well giving out my name will not get me into some sort of troubles right? I was assuring myself.
The bickering duos stop their silly convo once they heard me talking, seems like they just realized I was there. They look at me with such curiosity.
"So Jungkook ah, welcome to Bangtan!"
Out of no where, the mint haired guy shouted and clapping his hands, the other guys also clapping and suddenly the Jimin guy was hugging my back.
I just thought, what are these guys?
What is Bangtan?
But well.. at that time I don't care even if they might be criminals, gangster, mafia or some sort..
Because.. it's my first time to be really welcomed. and part of something..
My existence finally has meaning, I guess.
And since then.. Bangtan was my home.. The six guys were my brothers..
And I started to feel care.. I finally begin to have feelings, some sort of affection and attachment.
I have something I cared about.
They made me begin..
But then.. as the words that engraved in my heart says ""You will not experience how it feels when losing someone, if you don't have someone in the first place" erase that "not" part into positive sentence, I begin to feel really scared.
What if I lose them?
How painful will I feel?
I'm scared.
Especially for Yoongi hyung.
Because I thought I could lose him that day.
It was a usual day.. but that day, most of the Hyungs has something else to do so we can not hang out full team.
It was only me and Yoongi hyung. We just walk around and unknowingly we stopped at Euphoria Music Shop. I'm still giggling when I read that name, its still too tacky to my liking.
Yoongi Hyung was staring at that piano again. I saw sadness in his eyes. I don't know what it is, he never told us about it.
When the old man whom I guess is the owner of that shop offer him to play that piano, Yoongi hyung just shake his hands politely, but somehow I know he would like to play it.
So I just pull his hands and drag him into the shop, I want him to play that piano. I know he really wanted to play it.
"Hyung, lets play it!" I drag Yoongi hyung into the shop and sit in front of that piano.
Yoongi hyung was really hesitant, he was already sitting in front of that piano. His fingers are ready on top of the notes, but he didn't play it. He couldn't.
Because at that time, I saw his hands trembled, I don't know what happened to him, but his eyes looks really hurt, badly hurt.
He keeps trembling and I don't know what to do.
"Hyung! are you okay? hyung?" I shake his shoulder, to me.. he seems like falling into a deep abyss.. his eyes looks so dead.
His hands feels cold, and he keeps trembled..
I really don't know what to do..
then some part of my brain which still functioning tell me to quickly brings Yoongi hyung to hospital.
So again, I dragged him out of that music shop,
I was panicking..
should I call taxi?
or should we run? but I'm not sure if Yoongi hyung can run while he trembles badly.
My mind was a mess, and we keep walking, because I can't seem to find taxi in that area.
I keep gazing at Yoongi hyung.
Strangely, he seems getting better, and stop trembling, after a moment.
I relieved a bit. But still I think we have to go to hospital, I'm really afraid something bad might happened.
"Hyung, are you okay? we should go to hospital" I said while observing his expression and it seems he's getting better, his eyes started to have life in them.
"I'm okay.. " He said shortly, and he expect me to believe that?
"No Hyung, we should go to hospital" I said sternly, and ready to drag him again, this time to a freaking hospital, because he need it.
But he push my hands away,
"No, I just need my pills." He said, while walking away.
I was taken aback.
I didn't know Yoongi hyung was sick to the point that he has to take pills?
I was so worried that I follow him to his apartment. Of course, he keeps shooing me away and walking or even running away.
Sigh... this hyung why he's like that, I can't understand either.
But then, he don't have any choice to let me in once I reached his apartment.
While sighting dramatically he let me in.
And that day. he finally open up to me.
He's been sick, and constantly need his pills to calm his panic attack, and go to psychiatric..
All because of that horrible incident.
He told me everything.
About the fire..
his mother..
everything..
at least that's what I thought.
But it seems, it was not all.
And I was so oblivious.
only if I knew.. i wouldn't have done something horrible as that night.
I hurt Yoongi hyung so bad.
I was the one who drive him to his.... death...
Y/N POV
I never thought waking up late with a sore body was really a happiness for me.
It was because.. when I woke up, he was right beside me..
when I woke up all I can see is his face.. his mint hair.. his cute sleeping face.. his hands which currently still holding mine really tight..
and that words that he muttered yesterday..I still remember it clearly
"I love you"
Those three words succeeded in making me blushed.
"Y/N..... " I heard his raspy voice...
I just smiled, when he opened his eyes, while looking at me. He's too adorable.
But suddenly I'm really worried.
Did he remember what he said last night?
Did he remember saying he loved me?
or was it just sleep talking?
what if he forget and my heart fluttered for nothing?
Somehow I feel slight tug in my heart and hit some realization. I shouldn't be all fluttered my self, I should get a hold of myself, or otherwise I will be brokenhearted.
And thus, I let his hand go.
"I should get going..... " I said while getting up and I also saw Yoongi getting up as well.
After collecting all my things, bags and stuff, I look at him. I really hope he say something which can assure me.
What are we now. But he said nothing, so I just keep going to the door.
"Bye" I said, I cannot control my feelings, honestly I feel disappointed. It seems like he forgot. Or perhaps, its only in my dreams in the first place. How stupid I am.
I sigh..
Now this is what broken heart feels like.
Its painful.
I opened the door of Yoongis apartment, I swear I will never come back again, and I hope my brain and my body won't do anything that betray that promise.
Before I shut the door to his apartment, I heard he called my name.
"Y/N... I will pick you up today" He said calmly.
I was taken aback.
Pick me up? what did he mean.
It was probably shook me so bad that I turn my head as fast as lightning, thank God my neck didn't break or something.
"Pick me what?" I asked him.
And he just smiled. Yoongi just smiled with half asleep face while scratching that mint hair of his.
"Pick you up from work... then.. we will have our first date.. " He said, simply.
And I can't comprehend, because I didn't expect it at all.
"First da... wha..t?" I stuttered.
"I think you will late for work.. " He said while signaling to look at my watch.
And he's right, I'll be late. My boss will kill me if I'm late, and it means I can't have date with him.
No I don't want that to happen.
So I just hurriedly go to the office, but then my mind wanders a lot to him, and I get nervous, because... today is our first date.
Dating Min Yoongi.
Was a happiness.
I really felt happiness when I am with him.
But then.. love is not all about happiness, and fluttery moments.
It has darkness as well, I am well aware of that.
But I believe if I'm with him, we can get through it together, that was I thought.
However, as expected, it was very hard.
Watching him struggling was a very painful experience for me. But, I already promised, i will support him.. so even if he's in pain, I have to support him to keep going, to keep fighting.
I thought that we are fighting together..
But it seems he was in fact fighting alone..
Because my words of support can't reach him..
How can it reach him?
It's not the kind of words he would like to hear..
All this time, I said wrong words.. the words which even poison him even more..
......
To Be Continued
......
Part 6 DONE!
Please pray for Yoongi's scalp, he's been dying his hair mint through out this story. LOL. And again I was caught in a lieeeeee.
I drag the story again.. and I felt that this chapter sucks.
T__T
Well well, I will write that Yoongi's moment when I'm ready.
I don't know when.
But for sure, I will keep updating.
Well then, see you on next part.
Please stay healthy and happy
Byeeh
Please pray for Yoongi's scalp, he's been dying his hair mint through out this story. LOL. And again I was caught in a lieeeeee.
I drag the story again.. and I felt that this chapter sucks.
T__T
Well well, I will write that Yoongi's moment when I'm ready.
I don't know when.
But for sure, I will keep updating.
Well then, see you on next part.
Please stay healthy and happy
Byeeh
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